Welcome to the Ocean Grove Lodge! Ask about our serial killer discount!
The Ocean Grove Lodge! SEE!!! The .22 shell casings littering the stoop of your cabin! HEAR!!! The heartbreaking sobs of the runaway next door! SMELL!!! The lingering residue of the Raid bug bomb!
Tour the Mystery Pub at the Ocean Grove Lodge! Be amazed as your notions of logic and reason are confounded by the presence of free WiFi in a bar with no beer on tap. NO BEER ON TAP!!
The moral? Sometimes the definition of "rustic accommodations" can vary wildly depending on the individual. To be fair, the fact that this place is owned and operated by a guy who calls himself "Cap'n Bob" should have been a dead giveaway.
It's very, very good to be home!
We call it the open grave.
ReplyDeleteEek. This sounds too sinister, too weird for words (though you did a good job).
ReplyDeleteI for one, am glad that you are home.
That which doesn't kill you was probably just visiting his mother in Bungalow Six
ReplyDeleteSix
Six.
Did you see Hawk outside looking for the One-Armed Man? Hopefully you were lucky enough to get a drive by grobing on Coop.
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...the Ocean Grove Lodge is just a *sideline* you understand...
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(Capn.) Bob
When you like going on adventures, you have to own up to the fact that exploring cool and unusual places might come at the expense of having to spend the night every now and again in exceedingly sketchy situations. Note that I didn’t say “sleep” - there was no “sleeping” in The Open Grave Lodge (as it will now and forever be known). Only an overnight vigil against zombies, wolfmen, psychotic mama’s boys, and men with hooks instead of hands. Speaking of prosthetics - I know you think those fishnets and glam glitter pumps disguised your wooden leg, Cap’n Bob, but I knew it was you all along.
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